One of the issues that I’ve worked on in the past year is managing my “self-talk.” You’re probably wondering, what are you talking about? Basically, I am referring to the messaging that I send to myself…about myself.
When I was younger I wasn’t conceited I was convinced. I was very self-assured and confident because my mom made a point of working on my self-confidence. She was very concerned (rightfully so) that I would be negatively affected by the messaging that I would see in media everyday.
In the past year as I tried to reboot and re-imagine my life I realized something huge. I was constantly telling myself negative things about myself. This self-sabotage was the number one problem when it came to my money, my self-esteem, and my ability to imagine what I could do.
As I’ve worked on positive self talk this year I also realized that what you tell yourself is also how you present yourself to other people people. How can you be a bada@@ if you don’t think that you are one?
How can you be attractive if you don’t tell yourself that you are attractive? How can you be a success if you tell yourself all of the reasons that you are a failure or will fail? Successful athletes don’t seem to have this problem.
5 Reasons Self-Talk is So Important
- You believe what you tell yourself so spend some time figuring out what you’re telling yourself thousands of times everyday and then work on it if it’s negative.
- You can change your circumstances through positive self-talk. There more positive I become the harder it is for negative beliefs to take root.
- Once you’re constantly talking to yourself in a positive way, you’re able to trust your inner voice. Your inner voice could also be called your “gut”
- Whatever you’re telling yourself is what you’re telling other people through subtle behaviors. If you feel: ugly, bad, a failure and you’re telling yourself these things everyday. You’re telling other people this as well.
I am finding that I’m spending a lot of time working on my self-talk. It’s so important to me to change what I’ve been telling myself so that I feel good about-myself. The thing is it takes time. Especially if you’ve been telling yourself negative things for years.
I was just at the Australian Tennis Open and I discovered something very interesting. These superstar athletes don’t just shout at themselves about what they could do better, they also self-talk and pump up their self-esteem through their t-shirts.
Here are some great examples:
What Are You Telling Yourself Everyday? Is Your Negative Self-Talk Hurting Your Dreams? Is Your Positive Self-Talk Helping You Manifest Your Dreams?
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You are right about how self talk can have a negative impact to your mind if not controlled. It can also sabotage many things in your life for lack of confidence.
I’ve spent a lot of time working on this because I realized that I had a lot of negative stuff floating in my head. Unfortunately, it will take some time to work through that!
Oh I’ve really gotten into this lately. I’ve always used self-talk during workouts and beach volleyball games. I sometimes talk to myself so much that my partner is like, “did you say something?” lol! I love mantras in that arena and I’m starting to incorporate many more into my life now. One of my favorites: “abundance flows into my life effortlessly” And I have many more! Save for looking like a crazy person if you are out walking the street saying mantras out loud, it can’t hurt right? 🙂
I love it! It was crazy listening to what the players were saying to themselves as they went though the matches. I would be afraid to fail too if I told myself all of the things they were telling themselves! I also have to remember not to talk out loud too!
Genius!! Improving the quality of your inner voice can only help you rely on it more, thus leading to better decisions and more positive actions. Here is an example of an upward cycle instead of the typical downward ones. I’ll say it again… Genius!!
Hehe! I had to learn this the hard way after discovering that my inner voice was telling me things I wouldn’t want told to me. So, I have to work on it everyday to get my thoughts aligned with what I want.
This is very true. What we think affects who we are more than anything else. We tried to only think and say positive things for a day last year as an experiment and it was REALLY hard. It think it’s an important thing for us to all work on.
What I tell myself on a daily basis is probably one of the hardest things that I’ve worked on. I’ve noticed a huge change in how I feel about myself and since working on my self-talk. BUT, I still have a long ways to go.
I’ve been working on this for a while and I always have to remind myself that I didn’t develop this overnight so it will take a while for it to be unlearnt. I’ve learned to be gentle with myself. In the end it’s nice to see the progress I’ve made!
I love the following from your comment: “to be gentle with myself…” I tend to be very hard on myself and it doesn’t really help. So, I am working on being peaceful with myself.
Love this, Michelle! And your photo too! “I’m not a player I just blog a lot!” I WANT. Keep up the positive self-talk and let’s rock this year.
I first saw J$ wearing that t-shirt at FinCon and had to have it!! I am working on positive self-talk everyday. It’s a process.